Another Sleepless Night 

I’m getting to the point where I’m having a love/hate relationship with work. More specifically, with time off from work.
I work at a year round school, so we have a lot of breaks throughout the year – which I used to love. Right around the time you start to get exhausted and feel like there’s no end in sight, a long break comes up. I used to relish those breaks! A two week fall break, a few more weeks, and then almost a full week off for Thanksgiving, and then in three weeks we have two more weeks off for winter break. And the spring is pretty similar.

Before you get angry and stop reading, there is a downside to this. What is it, you ask? It is the all important Baby Schedule.  

My mom takes care of Ben while I’m at work. When I’m off of work, I take care of Ben (no big surprise there). But, though similar, we parent and take care of him differently, and he notices.  

This past week he was with me almost 100% of the time for Thanksgiving break. Yesterday was my first day back at work, and he resumed his schedule with my mom. Nothing much changed when I got home from work, but last night…..oh last night….it was awful.

The kid did NOT want to be put in his crib. He wanted to be held, and snuggled and cuddled. He wanted to fall asleep nursing and then stay there, boob in mouth, all night. Any time that we tried to move him to his bed – he would wake up screaming before he had even touched his bed.

At 11:00 last night (2+ hours into getting him to go to bed) J and I gave up, and moved him into our bed, where Ben slept peacefully the rest of the night. J and I on the other hand, slept horribly. We’re reduced to sleeping on our sides facing Ben. We stayed incredibly aware of blanket placement so that it didn’t get anywhere near his face. And, every time Ben woke up, stirred, kicked or twitched, we woke up lightning fast ready to lull him back to sleep so we could get back to sleep.

And when the alarm went off at 5:35 this morning….I wanted to cry. I still want to cry. I’m at the exhaustion level where the tears are right behind my eyes, but nothing is wrong other than the fact that I’m tired.

Anyway, this is an incredibly long post to say that I believe Ben is compensating for being away from me all day by wanting to be with me all night. And, as flattered as I am (obviously this means that I’m awesome), I don’t think I can take much more of this special treatment.  

I’m tired. I want a nap, but as a parent of two, that’s just not going to happen….


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