What Would You Do?

I need opinions.  I’m so incredibly angry and upset and it’s really hard for me to remain objective about this, so I welcome comments – with the caviate that they are constructive.

I’m having a huge issue with Henry’s daycare right now.  Here’s what’s up:

Our daycare provides a sheet that has all the information about Henry for the day.  Meaning that when I pick him up I can look at it and see what time he was given all of this bottles, when and how long his nap(s) are.  How many and what time diaper changes were and what was the contents of his diaper.  It also has what he ate that day in terms of solid food.  And last, but not least what activities they did for the day.

When I picked Henry up today, I glanced at his sheet and noticed something on there that I had never seen before and it immediately sent me over the edge.

Under the bottle section, it said “Gave Henry our formula.”

WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!?!?!

I snatched the paper up and walked over to his afternoon teacher.  I asked her, “what does this mean “Gave Henry our formula”??  His afternoon teacher had no idea.  She doesn’t get into the room until 4:30, and Henry’s done with all of this bottles by then.  So, together we walked over to the administrator to ask her about it.  The office administrator looked confused, and said that she was going to call his daytime teacher to ask about it.  She was hoping that his teacher had accidentally written on the wrong form.  That hope disappeared when I looked in his diaper bag and saw ALL of the bottles of breast milk that had been packed in there.  Three bottles, totaling 12 ounces that all had to be dumped down the drain because they’d been sitting at room temperature all day…

The office administrator couldn’t get a hold of his teacher while I was there ,and promised to call me this evening to let me know what happened.

I just got off the phone with her.  She said that his teacher hadn’t seen the bottles in the fridge or in the bag, and had assumed given Henry’s age that we had decided to stop with the breast milk and that we wanted him to be formula fed.


Don’t you think that I would have communicated that to his teacher, if that had been the case?  And, since nothing in our routine has changed one little bit for the past 6 months, don’t you think that if something does change all of a sudden that his teacher should have gotten off of her ass and called me to make sure this is what I wanted????  How fucking hard is it to use a phone??

And, I’m pretty sure that there was a dig in the comment directed at me.  “Given Henry’s age.”  I took that as “well, he’s almost a year old, and shouldn’t be breast feeding anymore.”  It could be that I’m reading more into that than I should, but I’m livid right now and that’s how I’m taking that statement.  


I’m seriously considering changing daycares.  They gave my breastfed son formula!  I’m not trying to start a formula vs breastfed debate.  But, I should have had my wishes regarding his nourishment respected and they weren’t.  Henry’s never had formula before.  What if he had an adverse reaction to it?  What if he was allergic to it?  I feel like my wants for my son’s care are not being listened to and undermined, and I am SO not ok with it.

We’ve had a few other issues with them too.  They stopped giving him the food that we were bringing “forgetting it in the refrigerator .”  Instead of fighting that battle, I just gave up and went with it.  They also keep putting diaper rash cream on Henry, and it doesn’t matter how clearly I explain that diaper rash cream used with cloth diapers creates diaper rash, they keep doing it anyway.

I don’t know whether I’m overreacting, or justified in my thought process.  I am seriously considering withdrawing him from this daycare and enrolling him in one that will respect my wishes and demands without condemnation or throwing digs when they’re the ones that fucked up. 

What would you do?


5 thoughts on “What Would You Do?

  1. Just ask them point blank, “is this the type of daycare where I can trust that Henry can receive the specific care his parents wish him to get, or is this not a good fit for us?”

    You are a paying client, you either get what you want or go somewhere else. A phone call is an absolutely reasonable expectation for ANYTHING out of the ordinary, ESPECIALLY diet changes! You are the mom.

  2. I you’ve had any issue with them before that wasn’t resolved the way you wanted it to, I would be looking for other options for daycare. Henry is your son, and you know what is best. If they aren’t cool with that, then it probably isn’t the place for you guys.

  3. I know you don’t know me, but your blog title pulled me in since I, at the time, was fighting for optimism as well. It ended up being a slightly different optimism, but, nonetheless, I am still following and felt compelled to comment.
    I worked in the childcare setting for 8 years. Your wishes should be granted. Period. It seems ridiculous to me that they couldn’t call you to discuss this before resorting to formula. I could only maybe understand if he had a sub for the day.
    I would consider his happiness before pulling him, but, if he stays there, I would absolutely make it clear that they need to use the phone!
    Finally, you can breastfeed until he’s 10 if you want!!

  4. Pingback: Daycare Troubles | fighting for optimism

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