Everything that I’m reading in my pregnancy books and online says that I should be feeling ravenous when it comes to food.  My appetite should be increasing, and generally speaking I should feel like a vacuum.  The thing is…..I don’t.  If anything my appetite has decreased.  Usually with breakfast I don’t have any trouble eating.  With lunch, I can finish my lunch about half the time.  But dinner….it will sound good, and taste good, but I just can’t bring myself to eat it.  I made red beans and rice last night for dinner, and it was yummy, but I seriously had to force myself to eat it, and even then I couldn’t finish it.  Over the weekend J made homemade mac and cheese (one of my favorites).  I think I had two bites.

I really don’t understand, but as the day goes on, I get less and less hungry.  It really doesn’t made sense to me at all.

Here’s a sample daily menu for me:

Breakfast:  Honeynut Cheerios with sliced banana and 1% Milk, Juice (I’ll eat all of this)

Lunch: Leftover Red Beans and Rice (I’ll eat about 1/2 to 3/4 of this)

Snack:  Apple (eat all of)

Dinner:  Chicken breast, wild rice, and asparagus (barely touch)

Anyone have any insight?


Year of the Dragon

In the Chinese zodiac, 2012 is the year of the dragon, and therefore my baby will be born in the year of the dragon, which is just cool.  Dragons are awesome, they’re bad ass and just plain cool.

I like reading things about astrological signs.  Sometimes they’re right on, and other times they don’t apply at all.  But I figured that we could delve into this a little bit.

For some background, I was born in the year of the rat (1984):

Being born a Rat is nothing to be ashamed of. In China, the Rat is respected and considered a courageous, enterprising person. It is deemed an honor to be born in the Year of the Rat and it is considered a privilege to be associated with a Rat. Rats know exactly where to find solutions and can take care of themselves and others without problems. They use their instinctive sense of observation to help others in times of need and are among the most fit of all the Animal signs to survive most any situation.

Besides just being a Rat, I’m also a wood Rat:

Despite having a remarkable facade of self-confidence, deep down, Wood Rats are the least sure of themselves compared to other Rats. However, they wouldn’t dream of showing this side of themselves to anyone. Only close companions of a Wood Rat would ever suspect that he or she had such self-doubt. In fact Wood Rats are often worried about downfall, despite their ability to find success. Well-liked, proficient, and good leaders at work, Wood Rats seem to function best when they are surrounded by family and friends. Cordial and delicate, they are usually well loved by family, friends and peers.

I’d say that this is a pretty good representation of me, that is if you have to sum me up in two paragraphs.  If you want to combine the Chinese Zodiac with the Western Zodiac, you get:

This Rat is delicate and incisive, and does well as a consultant or a counselor. Piscean Rats are creative, but tend to lack the confidence necessary and thus feel a need to be part of a team.

J was born the year of the Ox (1985):

Those born under the influence of the Ox are fortunate to be stable and persevering. The typical Ox is a tolerant person with strong character. Not many people could equal the resolution and fearlessness the Ox exhibits when deciding to accomplish a task or an objective. As we used this great creature long ago to plow the soil day after day, so do Ox people labor through their daily responsibilities either at work or at home without complaint or gripe. Oxen know they will succeed through hard work and sustained effort and find no truth or benefit in concocting get-rich-quick schemes.

Besides just being an Ox, J is also a wood Ox:

Understanding and fair, these are the least unyielding of the Oxen and the most apt to change and accept new ideas. A more liberal attitude gives them the ability to appreciate the value of being a part of a team, and other members of the team respect the high principles of the Wood Ox. They are particularly self-confident giving them an air of unspoken authority. This characteristic means that Wood Oxen are often chosen as leaders or spokespeople. They also have a shorter fuse than other Ox people, and are more likely to be outspoken or to stand up in a crowd to be heard. These Oxen are quite devoted to those they love and make strong and affectionate friends and relations.

East Meets West:

Capricorn Ox

Capricorn Oxen are made of true resolute.  As sustained effort allows them to achieve a very comfortable way of life.  They are conservative and responsible and will work long hours to provide their loved ones with security and comfort.

I’d say that this fits J to a T, and I’m pretty sure that he’d agree with me.

As to our baby, it’s hard to say what he’ll actually be like, but according to the Chinese zodiac……

Dragons are the free spirits of the Zodiac. Conformation is a Dragon’s curse. Rules and regulations are made for other people. Restrictions blow out the creative spark that is ready to flame into life. Dragons must be free and uninhibited. The Dragon is a beautiful creature, colorful and flamboyant. An extroverted bundle of energy, gifted and utterly irrepressible, everything Dragons do is on a grand scale – big ideas, ornate gestures, extreme ambitions. However, this behavior is natural and isn’t meant for show. Because they are confident, fearless in the face of challenge, they are almost inevitably successful. Dragons usually make it to the top. However, Dragon people be aware of their natures. Too much enthusiasm can leave them tired and unfulfilled. Even though they are willing to aid when necessary, their pride can often impede them from accepting the same kind of help from others. Dragons’ generous personalities give them the ability to attract friends, but they can be rather solitary people at heart. A Dragon’s self-sufficiency can mean that he or she has no need for close bonds with other people.

He will be a water Dragon:

Water has a calming effect on the Dragon’s fearless temperament. Water allows the Dragon to re-direct its enthusiasm, and makes him more perceptive of others. These Dragons are better equipped to take a step back to re-evaluate a situation because they understand the art of patience and do not desire the spotlight like other Dragons. Therefore, they make smart decisions and are able to see eye-to-eye with other people. However, their actions can go wrong if they do not research or if they do not finish one project before starting another.

East Meets West:

Cancer Dragons have polished tastes and are generally an artist of some sort. Their homes act as show- cases of these artistic talents. These are less self-indulged characters and are caring, tender, individuals. For them a tight-knit relationship and established home are necessary for happiness.

It doesn’t matter if you subscribe to any of this or not.  It’s still fun to look into and read about.  If you’re curious about you or your little one, here is the website where I got my information:

My Baby!

Here are the pictures of my baby!  I know that they’re not the best quality, but it’s all I got.   These pictures are basically just of his head in a profile view.  The bottom left one has him waving at us!!! What a cute baby!

For Those of You Who Guessed Girl…!

You were wrong!  It’s a boy!

J and I are ecstatic!  Of course we’d be ecstatic with a girl too, but it is nice to know one way or the other.

As far as names go, we’ve decided that his middle name will be Steven Michael, after my father.  I like that a lot, it gives me a sense of peace and pride.  My baby will never get to know his grandfather, and in this special way they’ll be connected.  It just seems very fitting to me.  I’ve already received some negative comments from people saying two middle names for a kid is mean and that they’ll be made fun of in school.  To these people, I say “F**k you.”  As far as first names, you’ll have to wait until he’s born to find that out.  My mother-in-law already turned her nose up at two of the ones that we like, so from here on out my mouth is clamped shut.  My MIL also commented that she’d like her father’s name represented some how, as to that, I’m pretty much saying no – although I’m open to using his hebrew name, for my son’s hebrew name, but that’s as far as I’m going.  This is why I didn’t want to tell people names to begin with….

As far as the rest of the world is concerned, J and I haven’t found out the sex of the baby.  It’s not going to be on facebook, and excluding immediate family, and my loyal blog readers, no one else knows that it’s a boy.  I’ve also already received guilt trips for this from my MIL who commented that she would really like to tell her mother, because, God forbid, if she died and didn’t know, it would eat at her….  I still said no.  I’m a cold hearted bitch, what can I say…..

J is also giving me a guilt trip on this, even though he agreed to the terms in the ultrasound room.  We agreed that we’d find out the sex if we could keep the results to ourselves.  Now he keeps telling me that all he wants to do is tell everyone, and wouldn’t it be fun to tell everyone?  My response…no, it wouldn’t.  I’m excited and over joyed that we’re having a boy, and I want to keep that news to myself for a bit and bask in the glow that we’re having a boy without being bombarded by people wanting to know all the details on what we’re going to name him and so on and so forth.

I think it’s kinda sad that something this exciting is also mixed with grief and guilt.  Oh well.  I’m sticking to my guns for the time being, and everyone else who disagrees can suck it (sorry if that’s harsh, but that’s how I feel).


So, yesterday, J and I had the anatomy scan of Poppy Seed.  It was awesome and so cool!  I know that I mentioned before that I wanted to wait to find out the sex.  Well….I gave in to J’s badgering yesterday, and we found out!  Now, before I tell you what we’re having, I’d like to get your guesses!

Here is some of the latest info for you as well:

  • Heart beat was at 157 yesterday
  • I’ve had horrible and persistent morning sickness
  • I’m carrying high
  • I crave fruit, and sour things
  • Chinese gender chart says Girl

So, what do you think?  Boy or Girl?

Sweet Potato

Dear Poppy Seed –

At 18 weeks you’re now the size of a sweet potato!  According to “What to Expect,” your practicing your moves in there.  I can’t be sure, but I think I might have felt you move this morning.  It felt exactly like it did a couple weeks ago when I first thought I felt you move, but quickly talked myself out of it, because it only happened once.  At the moment, it just feels like someone is poking me from the inside, although, this morning it did flutter a bit, making me really think that it was you!  It’s an awesome feeling, so keep it up!  I can’t wait for your dad to feel it too, so keep practicing those moves!!!  You’re also working on your swallowing, sucking and yawning skills as well, which will really come in handy for you.  At our ultrasound yesterday, it said that you’re measuring in at about 9 ounces, which means that you now weight over half a pound!  It looks like your taking my advice, and you’re growing like mad!

This week there haven’t been many changes going on with me.  I still get sick about once or twice a week.  Because I sit at work for most/all of the day my feet and ankles have started to swell.  I now am making it a point to get up and walk around during the day to try and help out with that, as well as drinking large amounts of water.  Yesterday, my BP came down a bit to 124/72, which made my midwife really happy, and she told me to keep up what I’m doing.  I also didn’t gain any weight the past week either – which she said was fine.  Last week I ordered a prenatal workout DVD that has cardio, strength training, pilates and yoga on it, with variations for each trimester, and I’m really enjoying it!  Usually, about once a day, I get a headache, but they’re pretty bearable, and tylenol seems to help keep them under control if they get bad.  Also, my hands fall asleep at odd times.  Sometimes it will be one, or the other of both, but it doesn’t really happen at work.  It happens most often at home, which I find really weird.

Yesterday, we had a detailed ultrasound done of you.  It was really cool to see you up on the big screen.  Your grandmother came with us, and she cried the whole time.  It was awesome to see you moving, wriggling and squirming in there.  You were a bit camera shy though, and had your arms up covering your face for a good while, you looked like you were practicing your boxer stance.  We saw you hiccuping, which was sooo cute!  It’s amazing to see how much you’ve grown.  When we got home yesterday, I sat down and looked at all the ultrasound photos that I have of you.  The one taken at 4 weeks, 8 weeks, and now 18 weeks.  There’s such a huge difference!  You’re going to be such a cute baby, and my heart fills with love every time I look at these photos.  You’re my baby, and I love you so much!  As always, keep growing!

– Mom


I have a doctor appointment at 2:30 today for my monthly check-up as well as our 2nd trimester anatomy scan.  I haven’t been able to get anything accomplished at work today because I’m so excited and nervous about my appointment!  This will be the 2nd time we’ve seen the baby on the big screen, and the last time we saw Poppy Seed was 10 weeks ago!  I can’t wait for my appointment!  I keep staring at the clock, willing it to go faster so that I can grab my purse and go!  Only 40 more minutes till I get to leave here, I hope that I don’t go crazy in that amount of time….

I’ll be sure to post an update about the appointment when I get back!